Author: Jemmie Jems

Under the name Francis Lee, I write interracial Christian romantic suspense. My stories are about finding enduring love when hope and redemption seem unattainable as danger lurks around every corner. My characters learn that where there is darkness, "joy will always come in the morning".

Single Dating and Social Distancing: 4 things to look for

  1. Can a single person find love while social distancing?
  2. What to do on a date while social distancing?
  3. How to date while social distancing?
  4. Red flags to look for dating while social distancing?
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

Can a single person find love while social distancing?

It can be lonely living in isolation in a one bedroom apartment or in a house with a lot more room with only the walls to talk to day in and day out. That laptop is getting boring as you binge on those episodes of you favorite show you just didn’t have time to watch before that Coronavirus took over your life and the world. Since then things have never been the same: no more drinks after work with the office friends, shopping with girlfriends, no weekend trips with a group of friends and finally, no first date nights.

What is there to do when there is the need to socialize and meet that special someone?

Dating sites are seeing spikes in online connections. Sites such as OKCupid are reporting a jump in daters sending more than 35 million introduction messages in March about 4 million greater connections than last year and a 5 % increase in long term relationships. ( Erin Carson of CNET – April 19, 2020) Match.com has even added a new feature a new video calling service Vibe Check for social distancing singles and a 1-888 number to ask questions with a Relationship Expert for free advise. Other dating sites are doing something similar.

Relationship experts are calling online connections with dating apps, streaming services and digital face timing the rise of modern courtship. The loose definition of courtship is a period of development leading to an intimate relationship. Basically, it is a time when the couple forms a bond.

Healthy communicating brings transparency into any kind of relationship and tackling these issues becomes easier. It helps to build trust –

lovebondings.com

Transfer of information from one person to the other is a good way to get to know someone; a great way to see if there is first, some kind of connection that can eventually lead further.

Meeting someone virtually may not be a bad idea. There are so many sites out there today that allow the user to feel safe while connecting to a stranger. But dating sites are still not for everyone.

If you do venture on one of these sites, take things nice and slow. Sometimes just connecting to someone as a pen pal is just as satisfying, because you get to share experiences and interests. Being a friend can help someone else having a hard time while being alone. And it is friendship that can last the longest when everything else is out of control. Remember everyone has some kind of agenda: bad or good.

Stay within the safety of the dating site. Some sites such as Christian Café and eHarmony have safety zones and strongly recommend at the beginning not to connect with personal e-mail or phone numbers but to use their messaging system for safety reasons. Be aware and stay safe.

Dating in 2020

There is no right answer for single folks out there to find friendship or love while social distancing. We have to adhere to government rules in order to flatten the curve so that things will come back to some kind of normalcy. What that new normal will look like is something we will have to wait and see, but we can discuss projections at a later date.

As a Born Again Believer, I like to pray first before jumping into anything new. Maybe praying about a matter before heading out wouldn’t be a bad idea.

Next up? What to do on a date while social distancing?

Remember be aware and stay safe…

3 major industries making a change because of Covid -19

In March of this year, Premier Doug Ford introduced the Ontario Together Fund where 50M is given to companies to retool to produce equipment for the Covid- 19 fight. Some companies from automotive sector to alcohol and spirits have answered the need for more equipment and products such as ventilators, surgical masks, face shields and hand sanitizers to help and to serve their local communities and to support front line staff. – CTV News: March 24, 2020

Prime One such industry is alcohol and spirits across the country and not just in Ontario. The Corby Sprit and Wine Ltd distillery in Walkerville which has been operating for over 160 years is now making hand sanitizers, so too is Top Shelf Distillers in Perth, Ontario; – CTV News by Alexander Mae Jones March 24, 2020. The call from the Prime Minister Justin Trudeau for companies to step up and help the nation was answered by distilleries in B.C such as Ampersand Distilling Co to Yukon Brewing right across the nation to Deep Roots Distillery in P.E.I. A number of distilleries so many to list are lending their support.

Second: several Toronto Public Libraries are changing rows of books for shelves of food in order to meet the 53 % increase in client usage in Toronto due to lay offs and Food Bank closures because of Covid -19. Over 100 staff members from a number of Toronto libraries, volunteer to pack 500 to 600 hampers of food per day and hope to continue their efforts until the city gets back to normal.

Third: due to the growing shortage of flour Canada’s oldest water powered flour mill near London, Ontario called Arva Flour Mill is “going gangbusters to feed the demand from home bakers created by the coronavirus lockdown.” – Heather Rivers. They provide up to 300 to 500 customers per day which is four to five times more than normal. -London Free Press by Heather Rivers April 7, 2020.

Although the city if not the entire country is on lockdown where most of us need to stay home, some industries as mentioned and so many more not listed, are working hard to keep the country together and to do their part in this fight against Covid -19. United we stand O, Canada.

Two Reasons Why This is Not the New Normal

But for now in this early part of the year 2020, the beginning of this new decade, it is important to practise social distancing in order to flatten the curve so that things can get back to normal.

  • Humbertown Mall Social Distancing
Social Distancing in March 2020

Saying this is the new normal is like saying there is no hope.

Is it normal to stay in our homes for days, weeks or even months; some people live alone whereas others live with roommates, family or pets.  Is it normal to wear a mask out in public going to work or to appointments or just out picking up groceries? 

Is it normal to put a long awaited wedding, class graduation or birthday party online and have friends and family post in through social media because everyone in the city has to remain apart, at a two meter distance? 

That isn’t normal.  That isn’t living.  But for now in this early part of the year 2020, the beginning of this new decade, it is important to practise social distancing in order to flatten the curve so that things can get back to normal. Back to a time when socializing was to laugh, talk and be happy face to face without this virus hanging in the air. 

The days of getting together with friends and family for some kind of social aren’t gone forever.  This is only a bump along the road of life and rest assured, “all these things must come to pass. But the end is not yet.” (Matthew chapter 24: verse 8, KJV)

There is always hope and without having faith, hope isn’t possible

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen,” and hope does not disappoint us. (Hebrews chapter 11 verse 1 and Romans 5 verse 5, KJV)  

Covid Journal 2020

Social Distancing is introduced.

Covid Journal Week One

This is a first hand account of what it is like to live in a Canadian metropolitan city during this Coronavirus outbreak of 2020.

Journey of the Covid -19 while working

Day 1 Ghost train

Its Monday and I am going to venture down town.  There is the concern of proximity working in a busy city. Would someone breathe in my face or worse sneeze on me?  How could I avoid contracting this horrible, death dealing virus?

At the station, I could count the number of cars on both hands in the parking lot and on the platform there are no more than 10 people. The train arrives with a splatter of people onboard. Just like a Ghost Train.

 I rode this Ghost Train all the way to Toronto without a single soul sitting beside me. It takes a virus to give me Rockstar seating. By the time I emerge from hollow cavern called the subway and walk through the corridors of the bus terminal, I get that creepy, uneasy feeling that makes the hairs on the nape of my neck stand on end.  The place is almost deserted like I was walking through some horror movie set.

Day 2 Tuesday

Union Station

Ghost train arrives again but on this day the city is on emergency measures for a lockdown.  Schools will not be coming back after the March break, events are to be cancelled, no large gatherings of over 50 people, non essential services are to be closed except for grocery stores, pharmacies, restaurants with take out capacities and alas, the piece de resistance, social distancing is introduced. 

What is social distancing?  Put simply:

Keep away from me, but be social because we need to flatten the curve.

How many times do we need to be reminded of flattening that curve?

A million times and ten times over until we do just that.

However, the words social and distancing are interesting because they are in direct opposition of each other.  Can you be social and be distant at the same time? 

The word social means gathering or a group or community getting together.  The word distance refers a numerical measurement of how far apart things are.  In 2020 amid this Covid -19 pandemic, we have to keep our distance from loved ones, friends, colleagues and fellow citizens. Social distancing is very important to help stop the spread of the virus.  Being face to face breathing in the air from someone who may have come into contact with someone with Covid-19 or who may have it and not yet realise it, is dangerous and contributes to the spread of the virus.

“It is a public health practise that aims to prevent sick people from coming in close contact with healthy people in order to reduce opportunities for disease transmission” hub.jhu.edu Katie Pearce What is social distancing and how can it slow the spread of Covid- 19

Keeping apart isn’t forever.  We have the hope that this thing can be reduced.  And the sooner we adhere to the advise of public health, the quicker we can get out and enjoy our lives again.  But for now, better to be six feet apart then six feet under. 

And the Lord, he it is that goes before you; he will be with you, he will not fail you, neither forsake you, fear not neither be dismayed.  Deuteronomy chapter 31 verse 8. ( paraphrased from the King James Version)

Moving Forward – a new day is coming

A new decade makes a new start. Every day is different and can be unique. Or so we can hope. Some people may hate the idea of going into a new year or even a new day when they have to face many adversities. When tragedy strikes and there is no where to turn, it is hard to see the new year as something bright and blessed. It becomes another day.

Last year was very trying for us. Who is us? My family consists of my sisters, my little puppy and me. Two of my sisters are married and have households with husbands and grown children making them family units of their own. But my household is where I live of course, and where I am loved. The old saying by Roman author and philosopher, Pliny the Elder ( AD. 23-79) Home is where the heart is”– can never be truer for me. The idea of “home”, a place of safety, a place where I can find love and protection is always where I want to be. Home for one person may not be a place, “actual point in space or a position” as written in the English dictionary, but it could be one person or a group of people. It is more than just a noun, a person, place or thing but can also be a state of being. A state of being free, relaxed and loved.

Who is us? For me us is my loved ones, those individuals who want me around without question and those who can judge me, correct me and make me feel like I am important. They are my family and with them comes a home where my heart is.

What happens if there is no one or no place to go for safety and security, a home where there is always criticism and censure. A place where there is no safety. Or just plainly put, a home where there is nothing or not enough?

There is One who will be your everything, a “home” at all times. God can be that “home”, the place of safety and love.

In the Bible it reads:

And you shall seek me (God), and find me (God), when you shall search for me (God) with all your heart. – Jeremiah 29:13

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. – Matt 7:7

This is a new decade and a new day and a fresh start. Put God first everyday and in everything you do.

I have my “home” with my family and I am blessed to have an eternal “home” in Christ Jesus because He is my rock, my shield and my help. He gave me this family and I can thank Him everyday. He daily loads me with benefits (blessings) that I can never say enough because I have made Him Lord of my life.

Blessed be the Lord, who daily loads us with benefits – psalm 68:19

Life – Mission Impossible

My Mom always said, ” trust Him where you cannot trace Him.”

When you don’t see things turning around in your life. The boss at work doesn’t give you credit and you work harder than others, the bills keep mounting up and your bank account has a zero balance, a loved one is ill or you just don’t know what to do with your life. You’ve done everything you know to do and still it isn’t enough.

Trust God

Jesus said in Mark 19 verse 27 …” with men it is impossible but not with God for with God all things are possible.

Trust Him where you cannot trace Him…

Comfort in a Snapshot – the Secret Place

He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty Psalm 91 verse 1

This verse is a promise from God or a snapshot of comfort

The Secret Place is a personal relationship with God (the Most High or the Almighty). Words of comfort from God are always true and pure. A relationship with God guarantees full and complete insurance coverage. He will give protection, guidance, counsel, love and much more. There is nothing He will withhold because all things are available to us – to those who love Him.

see also Proverbs 18 verse 10

  • Amen

O Canada – We the North

Today, we make history here in Toronto by hosting the NBA champion playoffs. The playoffs have never gone North but now they have and in a few short hours Toronto will have their shot at basketball stardom.

Canada is a great place to visit as well as to live. The multicultural feel of this wonderful city Toronto is great from the support of the basketball fans to the average people on an average day.

I love this city. It is my home and I’ve lived here all my life. Sure it has its fair share of problems small and not so small, but all things aside we can stand together when the time is right. And the time is now. Where do you see in this great continent different races, cultures, ages, people of different languages come together to celebrate one thing?

No where but Toronto. There is nothing like Toronto.

This is our chance to shine as a international city with so many options, so many things to see, to do and to celebrate. We are a city of plenty and we like to share. Come visit. Cheer us on while we play our neighbour to the south in the NBA playoffs and see if you like us.

What’s there not to like?

Late Spring in Toronto

A Promise from God

In the book of Zechariah in the Bible, chapter 2 and verse 10B

I will dwell in the midst of thee says the Lord (KJV)

God is saying He will never leave me or forsake me. The Bible says God is holy and he cannot tell a lie. If I trust Him and believe His words there will be no doubts. He is right there for me no matter where I am or where I go. The fear of being alone is clouded when I trust in His word and His presence.

In this modern world seeing is believing and anything written in the Bible is laughed at. That doesn’t matter to me because even when the world around me laughs and says there is no God, I still keep trusting in Him because I know through faith that He is real. The opinions of others doesn’t change that fact. He is the living and true God and I believe in Him.

Knowing that my God will be there for me when I fall or fail in my goals. I may have a bad day. I may be grieving over the loss of a loved one or there is some kind of illness in the family or I can not pay my bills. I am so blessed to be able to call on Him and He gives me strength and provides for me all the time. The Bible says he hears all my prayers.

Lets make this new day a good day and count our blessings. Life is too short to waste and the path of life can get very twisted and hard to walk. We need a guide. How hard would it be to make God your guide.

May is Hearing Month: Hearing Loss and the Hearing Test

Hearing loss affects people of any age…

Hearing Loss Is For Young People Too

Hearing loss affects people at any age. It is an invisible disability that gradually progresses over time and if not treated can lead to several different medical conditions such as anxiety, depression, social isolation and relationship breakdowns ( Hearing loss)
The National Campaign for Better Hearing helps to spread the awareness of hearing loss prevention for those 60 years of age and older They invite Canadians to get a simple baseline test with the hope of reassessment in future years. In Canada, over 3 million people suffer from hearing loss which is approximately 1 in every 10 Canadians. (www.helpmehear.ca)
But what about the younger population, those under the age of 55?
Should younger folk be tested too?
According to the World Health Organization (WHO) “less than 1 billion young people ages 12 to 35 are at risk of hearing loss due to recreational exposure to loud sounds.” They agree that prevention starts by getting tested for hearing loss by a registered Audiologist or a certified Hearing Instrument Specialist. And of course, turning down the noise.
Now, what about those 36 to 59 years of age, should they be tested too?
The answer is yes. Millions of people globally are living with hearing loss and some don’t know it. Sometimes the signs of hearing loss are so subtle they can easily be ignored. Some signs may include:
• Asking people to repeat
• Difficulty hearing in background noise
• Ringing in the ear
• Turning up the TV or radio very loud where others complain
To list a few.
But what if there are no real signs of hearing loss?
What can be done?
Simply get a baseline test which is complimentary as part of a holistic health regime and if there is no hearing loss you can be screened annually or biannually as part of preventative measures.
Remember hearing loss affects people of all ages, cultures and status.
Get tested today

-Jem (Hearing Instrument Specialist)